So what’s the actual difference? Here are a few essentials:
Modern dating philosophy supposes that there’ll be several close romantic relationships in a person’s life before marriage. In fact, it recommend “playing the field” so that you can determine “what one desires” in a mate. Biblical dating has as its goal to be emotionally and physically close with only one member of the other sex … your partner.
Modern dating tends to be egalitarian (no differences between men and women in spiritual or mental “wiring” or God-given parts). Biblical dating tends to be complementarian (God has created men as well as women differently and has ordained each of those spiritual equals to play distinct and useful jobs in the church as well as in the family).
Modern dating tends to assume you will spend a fantastic deal of time together (most of it alone). Biblical dating tends to encourage time spent in group activities or with other folks the couple understands well.
Modern dating tends to suppose that a good relationship will “fulfill all my demands and desires,” and a bad one will not it is basically a self centered approach.
Modern dating tends to assume that there’ll be a higher level of psychological involvement in a dating relationship, and a few level of physical participation as well. Biblical dating presumes no physical intimacy and much more small emotional intimacy beyond marriage.
Biblical dating supposes a circumstance of spiritual liability, as is authentic in every other part of the Christian life.
Essentially, we can make general statements about modern dating vs. biblical dating in terms of their respective philosophies:
The modern dating approach tells us the way to find out whether I wish to marry someone is to behave like we are married. If we like it, we make it official. If we do not, then we go through something emotionally and likely physically like a divorce. In biblical dating, Scripture direct us regarding how to find a mate and marry, and the Bible teaches, among other things, that we ought to behave in this way in order never to suggest a union-level obligation until that dedication exists before the Lord.
Ask yourself why. What are you wanting to hold onto that you think this approach will require from you (privacy, autonomy, a secular notion of independence or of your personal rights)?
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